1 April, 2011
It is with great pride that I am announcing my intention to run for President of the United State in 2012! I plan to run as an independent and fight against those fatcats in Washington! Read on for my platform and some campaign materials for you to download!
It was after some careful consideration that I decided I wanted to run for president. I mean, I’ve spent enough time listening to customers whine, I might as well transfer that experience to something worthwhile. Not to mention highly profitable.
My platform is simple: I promise to fix bugs. All of them. Here are some examples:
1. Education I intend to design a better tutorial for our kids rather than continuing with the 12+ year process that seems to drag on and on.
2. Health Care I intend to increase the spawn rate of doctors and medical supplies to drive down costs.
3. Economy I intend to create something shiny and overpriced to drain excess money from the economy to control inflation. I’ll also set up a cash shop to give the government a needed influx of cash.
4. Employment I intend to increase the maximum number of employment quests people can hold at one time so they don’t get bogged down with half-finished tasks that they don’t want to drop from their employment quest log.
5. Legislation I intend to stop idiots from trying to abridge free speech by regulating video games to score cheap political points.
Excited about Psychochild 2012? I know I am! Here are some campaign materials you can use to get the word out!
Get the word out today!